Reneé Rapp, who plays the character Leighton on Mindy Kaling’s “s^x Lives of College Girls” series, recently shared on the Call Her Daddy podcast that she experienced “constant panic” while filming the first season because of her s^xuality.

Although she is now comfortable identifying as bis^xual, Rapp had a hard time accepting her s^xuality.

Growing up in the “super a**-backwards and very conservative” area of Huntersville in North Carolina, she had a difficult time coming to terms with her feelings.

“From the age of 14, Rapp had a difficult time accepting her s^xuality, and remembered ‘full blown crying’ and having a ‘panic attack’ after realizing she liked women,” the article noted.

Rapp struggled with insecurities during the first season, even though she was excited to be a part of the series.

She explained how it affected her self-worth, stating, “The first year of College Girls was terrible.

It sucked so bad because at the time I was in a heteronormative relationship and I hated going to work because I would be like, ‘I don’t think I’m good enough to be here, I don’t think I can be doing this, maybe I’m just trying too hard,’ and I would come home and psych myself out.”

Rapp also described how her anxiety was compounded by intrusive questioning on set.

“I’m doing these scenes and also having gay men come up to me and be like ‘are you really gay,’ It really fking p*ed me off and made me just second guess everything about myself. I was beating myself up so much. It was so crazy.”

Rapp opened up about her experiences navigating the TV industry as a queer woman in December, stating, “I was really afraid for the show to come out because I felt very judged, and I didn’t feel comfortable.”

Despite the difficulties, Rapp is excited for the second season, and has experienced personal growth since filming the first season.

“I actually was very excited for the second season to come out because I felt much more comfortable to not be terrified to hear something either homophobic or slut-shaming, or things like that,” she explained.

In the second season, Leighton’s love life takes a dramatic turn after she dumps her high society girlfriend Tatum to get back with her ex, Alicia. Rapp is not the only actor whose character has impacted them beyond the screen.

Amrit Kaur, who plays the s^x-positive character Bela, explained why the role means so much.

“She’s one of the few roles where we see a South Asian American in Hollywood be s^xual. It’s empowering for those who see themselves in that light to be seen on the screen,” Kaur noted.

“s^x Lives of College Girls” is available to stream on HBO Max and Sky Atlantic.